portraits of asher.

(( portraits of asher // 32 months ))

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     i am completely smitten with these photos. asher is continuing his phase of actually enjoying having his picture taken and i couldn't be happier about that. yesterday i was able to have two different mini-sessions of him in the boys' bedroom, which is the absolute best room for natural light photos in our house. these photographs just fill me up inside. entirely. i am a big fan of plain backgrounds and sweet faces and this set of photos remind me a little of these + these.

 

soft, gentle moments.

     moments like the ones you see here, hold such healing and magic for me. i mean really, truly, they do. painting photographs. writing them as a poem, bundling them up one heavy click at a time, to be read later and forever. for myself , for them, maybe for others. these photographs were taken during a  quiet evening outside. and my heart was quieted as well when i saw the light settling perfectly on his creamy peach-baby skin. highlighting his hair, his fingers, his chin, his lips. a slow and steady peace settled inside of me as i captured these soft and gentle moments. and with these, part of my heart is pictured as well.

 

portraits of asher / 31 months.

i love this boy + these pictures.

he radiates joy and appears so wild and free here. which is exactly how he felt in these moments:

frantically climbing from rock to rock, mountains as far as the eyes can see, happily running and breathing in the fresh air while slyly posing and looking to the side for his mama who loves to take
his pictures.

looking at these photos, i feel once again the peace and quiet and happiness of the moments in when i took them.

just a little glimpse of time,

saved.

pictures of cows.

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we were driving around the reservoir over the weekend, looking for new spots. and first of all, let me just say that i was so dang happy to get a picture of those cows. i have been thinking about taking pictures of cows for years. no really, i'm not just saying that.
many times as i drove home to our house in indiana, i would look at all of the cows that i passed and think about taking photos of them. indiana is full of so much pretty scenery: old barns, endless soybean and corn fields, pretty hazy sunsets and wildflowers. and there are so many cows. they truly became my favorite animal when we lived out there.
but i never took the moment to get the pictures that i wanted. i'm really bad about that; just stopping and getting out of the car to take a photograph. i'm too lazy i suppose.
and frankly, it never seems worth it.
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but this day. the other day, when i saw these black cows grazing in the hills like this, i finally had aaron pull over the car and i rolled down the window and i got it. it was just too, too perfect. because if there is anything better than cows grazing in the fields of indiana, it is certainly cows in the mountains. hands down.
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asher was stressing out in the backseat and roman was yelling at me and i had one of those mother-fail moments where i snapped for a moment.
and i just told everyone in the family to get used to it.
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sometimes i'm going to hang out the window when it's 20 degrees out to take a picture of the creek by the mountains. and sometimes i'm going to ask aaron to turn the car around so that i can get a picture of the orange and aqua sunset even though everyone is tired and wants to get home. in times like these, little boys are sure to squeal at me from the backseat.
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but gosh darn it, sometimes i'm going to pull over the car and take a picture of some cows.

and it's going to make me very happy.

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oh, and my family is cute too. they forgave me and then i snuck in some pictures of them as well ;)

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portraits of ash.

 

two portraits of my twenty one month old asher.

"i am your quiet place; you are my wild"

-Maryann Cusimano

happy friday!

i didn't used to like the idea of sharing my professional work on my personal blog. i like to be able to scroll down and just see uninterrupted photos of my boys, my family.
my blog is like a sweet little scrapbook. however, i have realized that my professional photos DO feel personal to me. after i put so much effort and care into them, i feel like i want to share them as many places as i can!

so there's a little preview of some photos i did for my sister's roommate for her graduation. you can see the rest of the photos on my sparse photography blog here.

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in other words, today is aaron's last late night shift at his job!
for the year, and maybe, probably, hopefully forEVER!
because in the next eight weeks we are planning to MOVE across the country!
but, more about that later ;)
for today, i need to start cleaning my house since my family is coming to stay the weekend and we are going to celebrate my sister's college graduation!
and right now, my little one is climbing up onto the sink to wash dishes
(his new favorite thing)
so, have a great weekend everyone!
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happy mother's day mamas!

pursuits of a five year old.

putting on his raincoat,
noticing that the flowers smell like candles, touching the soft white petals and feeling thankful that, "now we have our own garden!"
choosing some for mama,
placing them in a mason jar in the bathroom for all to enjoy.
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just some of the daily pursuits of a five year old.

easter sunday.

just a quick post to share some photos of our little easter bunnies yesterday.

gosh, they looked so adorable in their matchy match neon shorts and soft cuddly shirts. 

these boys had such a wonderful day. fun days like these, when my children are preoccupied with all the excitement, and therefore forfeiting their usual grumpiness, give me a chance to look at them from afar and see how wonderful they truly are :) 

i loved watching little ash carrying the big wire basket of plastic eggs down the hall at my grandparents house with the most satisfied smile on his face, watching him count the eggs "one doo tee!" and lining his puppies up all in a row.

roman's pure happy laughter in the backseat while playing with my little sister olivia, and his hard core determination to find as many eggs as he could during the egg hunt at aunt paula's :)

gosh, nothing better.

hope you all had a wondeful Easter!

here's to keeping Jesus at the center of our days, every day.

for the details on their outfits and to see roman + asher on spearmint baby today, visit me here!

teddy bear.

ok, so these are obviously old, but i think that they are too special to never share.
i have so many photos of this boy, of these boys of mine.
and they sit on my computer. or on disks. or on flashdrives. and my computer is jam stuffed FULL,
 it always is.
lightroom has 16,000 photos on it right now. as usual.
i have client sessions backed up all over the place in no particular order.
i am a disorganized mess. with random photo albums + half started projects here and there and everywhere.
with all these photos, yet none on my wall.
with visions and dreams of what to do with them, but never really doing much...
honestly it stresses me out sometimes.
 but in reality, it doesn't really matter. at all.
i kind of like being a disorganized mess - thank you very much.
and at the end of the day, it means nothing if the baby book is caught up,
or if i have a  baby book at all.
i'll get around to it, and if i don't, it's okay.
i just want to appreciate my photos for what they are - real moments in time with my blessings.

so, here are some photos from last spring to enjoy, at our last home, when asher was 10 months old.
playing in the back yard with his teddy bear that aunt hillary brought him from europe.

oh these boys, and these days. a dream come true.

p.s. how do you all organize family photos?? i would LOVE some ideas.
you know, ideas that i may never get around to doing ;)
also, do any of you have suggestions on a good external hard drive? 

 

nineteen months.

nineteen months.

oh my.

facing the reality that nineteen months has passed since asher's birth is simply unreal. just a moment ago i was folding tiny newborn gowns + reading spiritual midwifery in the sunshine on the back porch, preparing for a new little life. and now, over a year and a half later - our asher is almost a little boy. pushing his chair up to the sink so that he can grab my yesterday's coffee that sits inside. taking liberties to take his own diaper off when it's time for a change, singing the "mama" song that he composed himself, counting to three in his own little way. closer to two than one.

when the days were slower and asher was itty bitty, i often used to talk to him at night as he nursed to sleep about when he came into my life. i'd pet and kiss his sweet little head and apologize for not being there during that first week when he stayed in the nicu.  one of his doctor's told me during that week, that soon asher would be home and healthy and the time in the nicu would seem distant and brief. in a way that is not true to me. it’s true that one week is a short amount of time, but that was OUR first week. there is something so wrong about a mother and baby being separated at birth. even though i was able to spend much time with him, provide all of his milk for him, and was lucky that his stay was so short - there are still moments that we were robbed from. sometimes now at bedtime, i still go back to the beginning. i tell asher how much he means to me. nineteen months later i am still thankful that God answered my prayers and healed asher. that first week was hard, but for every first moment that was lost, i've now had nineteen months of asher in my arms each and every night to make up for it. and for that i will always be grateful.

Asher at eighteen months.

chapstick.

who knew a baby putting on chapstick could be so cute?

 if only a photo could capture one of asher's new favorite things to do which is to put one finger on his lips and say "hmm. hmm" 

oh my goodness, cutest thing ever...
also, i'm over on spearmint baby today! so thankful for the opportunity to write on such a wonderful site :)